on waiting and baby showers and baby shopping...

well it's kind of wild i'll be 36 weeks this sunday. i don't really know when that happened...but it did. i'm not sure when it will seem real because it's still not feeling so real. being uncomfortable is definitely real :) but the fact i'll have to give birth, and go home with a baby? not so real. 

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it's like waiting for a vacation...but after your vacation you go back to your normal life. but with this, your normal life is never the same. it's a strange concept to wrap your little head around! though i suppose it might be kind of like marriage in that it seemed SOOOOO weird that i was getting married, and then i got married. and it was normal. different? yes. but normal. it was weird that is wasn't weird. 

waiting has been...not bad. especially since it's gone by so fast. so fast that i feel like "oh my gosh how are we already so close and am i ready?!" that kind of feeling. i think the not knowing the actual day it will happen is what gets me. i'm uber organized, and i want to know everything ahead of time and be prepared for it. but i can't really do that here. i don't want her to come too early, but i don't want her to come past my due date either ha! 

{ask me about the funny thing my OB said when i told him i didn't want to have a baby any closer to christmas than i already am}

but i can't wait to see what she looks like and snuggle her and get to know her. i'm excited for her to get here, but in all honestly kind of terrified of labor and what it'll be like and what to expect and what will happen to my body after and the hormones {there are so many horror stories}. it's a lot of emotions bounding around when i start to think about it. i hope i'm a good mother, and i hope i'm ready.

we'll know soon enough!

 {29 weeks. i was having a really good hair day so i felt like i had to document it}

{32 weeks - bought me a new dress!}
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this weekend is my third baby shower. {3rd!} kind of crazy, but i'm lucky that i have a lot of really wonderful people in my life that all wanted to celebrate this little lady coming. my sisters are throwing the one this saturday and it'll be great. i'm excited to get together with so much family, both my side and matt's.
then...let the baby shopping commence!
i've been waiting until the showers are done so i know what else we need and then i plan on buying EVERYTHING that's left! i'm kind of excited about this. then i think i will feel more ready! even better that my mom and 2 of my sisters will be here to help me do it all.